10 things young urban Nepali women and girls can do to feel more powerful

In the past I have made a list about what men can to do help remove sexism and gender-based stereotypes. Now I am sharing what women can do, instead of feeling powerless. These are little changes that you, a woman, can make without worrying your parents. And if we all do this may be our world will be a better place, who knows!

     1. Take more space. The more space your body occupies, the more powerful you will feel. For example, don’t sit hunched up in the microbus. Spread a bit and sit straight, wherever you are.Watch this video for inspiration.

2.   Go shotgun. Talking about micros and tempos, sit in the cabin alongside the driver. I have noticed that women usually directly ride in the back or main space, rather than the front seat of a public vehicle. I understand that since the drivers are mostly men, you may not feel safe, but try it! I have tried this before. Sometimes the drivers get bored of me because even they don’t know how to make conversations with a woman in the front seat. (But be careful while you close the door. You do have to show the driver that you are capable of closing the front door properly. Once, the tempo driver shocked me by pressing my breasts with his arm while shutting the cabin door for me.)            

This was my first time riding in the front with the tempo driver

   3. Sit in the public spots with other women and girls and chill like a lot of men do. For example, tea shops, parks, roadside railings, etc. Chaukath, a feminist network, organizes events to do this.  

4.   Look up. This is very important. Don’t look down when people/men look at you. Why are you ashamed when they look at you? Stare back according to the situation. I understand that sometimes looking away is the best option. But what I have noticed when walking around is that I tend to look to the ground when I feel like I am being watched. I think it is a show of weakness. So stand and stare and be more powerful!

 

5.  Shake hands when you meet men and women: friends, co-workers. Don’t think that women should not shake hands with men. This may be hard if you are in a rural setting like me, but try it and I will do the same.

      
   6.   Be more aware. This could be by reading the newspaper every day or researching your topic of interest. It is important for men in office or even social settings to know that you are also equally capable. So be knowledgeable and when you are talking about different topics, show it! Hint: Get educated about the upcoming local elections! Do you know what candidates you like/support? Do you know the process of the vote? Do you know that Nepal will change significantly in the next five years because of this election? Start with checking whether you are in the voter list or not here.

      
   7.   Get inspired. Get to know other powerful women. Find panels or offices where women have significance.  Find your role models and talk to them.

8.  Participate. For example there are so many events and programs you can be part of in Kathmandu. Go. Get out of your comfort zones and go. Even better when you go alone. Hint: Volunteer for voter awareness. Also, don’t forget to speak up when you participate. Voices matter. Women voices matter. (Also be aware that you are knowledgeable and sincere of what you are talking about.)

9.  Get into computers. Computers, coding languages, start-ups, design-thinking, graphic design. These are some already outdated 21^st century skills that are a must. So get techhed-up! Men are already on it. So, why should women be left behind? Check out Code for Nepal for their work in empowering women through digital literacy.

10.   Spread the word. Since you have read this, have a conversation with another female about this and let me know how it went! I used to be eve-teased a lot as a school girl and a teenager. Now that I am older it has changed (also thanks to better laws in this regard). However, my teen sibling may be a victim and I can share these points and have a conversation with her. 1 to 10 are probably things that seem basic to some people. Some of you might already be doing this, kudos! But to those who find this new, do these things to feel more powerful!